Rant Time:Cell Phonies and Easy Riders
December 9th 2006 12:02
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Today more comic book characters I see at the gym and why you don't want to be like them.
My current favorite joke of a trainer is Cell Phony. The cell phony can be spotted several places in the gym. He likes to hang out on the machines with seats. That way he can make a couple of calls between sets. The problem is that, unless he has rented the machine, he is monopolizing it when others could be using it. The basic principal of gym etiquette is: "if you are not using it, get off it". Someone might want to use it while you are resting. The way I like to work is that I move from machine the next machine, constantly. I can come in and use a machine and be gone while someone else is resting. Of course, I can't, if someone has mistaken the machine for a phone booth. I don't care one little bit whether this self-absorbed person on the phone ever makes one gain of any kind; I do care that this rude, unpatented cartoon character never learned to share.
Another cell phony can be seen doing dumbbell curls with one hand and chatting to someone with the other. This is probably someone who thinks that the way to train is to do thousands of five pound curls because if you train heavy and then stop all your muscles will turn to fat. I'll tell you the truth. This goner is wasting his time and ought to devote himself entirely to cell phoning and get out of the way in the gym. Working hard is a basic pillar of fitness and you cannot be working hard if your mind is not engaged.
I sometimes find the flat benches I want to use occupied by a cell phone. I always feel the compulsion to "accidentally" drop an 80 lb dumbbell on it.
The other cartoon character is Easy Rider. This is a person who can be found on the recumbent bicycle. He doesnÂt cause anyone any inconvenience. Nevertheless, it makes me sad to see someone so ill-informed or willing to delude himself. Easy Rider is pedaling at about 50 rpm. Unless he is elderly and/or under strict orders from his doctor to take it really slow, he is wasting his time. Fitness is about challenging your body and that means it is better to set a faster pace and ride a shorter time than it is to dawdle along. Easy Rider may also have a book or magazine he is perusing while he slow motions along. I can see a book along with a brisk pace, but even then at some point you have to put aside the distractions and engage your mind in your pedaling.
This brings me to the positive side of these goofs. If you don't come to understand that training your body is a high concentration, focused enterprise you are expending energy without profit. At the end of a workout you should be a little mentally tired along with the physical. Cell Phony and Easy Rider are trying to have it both ways: get in shape and not put out much effort. Not going to happen. Your servant, as always.
My current favorite joke of a trainer is Cell Phony. The cell phony can be spotted several places in the gym. He likes to hang out on the machines with seats. That way he can make a couple of calls between sets. The problem is that, unless he has rented the machine, he is monopolizing it when others could be using it. The basic principal of gym etiquette is: "if you are not using it, get off it". Someone might want to use it while you are resting. The way I like to work is that I move from machine the next machine, constantly. I can come in and use a machine and be gone while someone else is resting. Of course, I can't, if someone has mistaken the machine for a phone booth. I don't care one little bit whether this self-absorbed person on the phone ever makes one gain of any kind; I do care that this rude, unpatented cartoon character never learned to share.
Another cell phony can be seen doing dumbbell curls with one hand and chatting to someone with the other. This is probably someone who thinks that the way to train is to do thousands of five pound curls because if you train heavy and then stop all your muscles will turn to fat. I'll tell you the truth. This goner is wasting his time and ought to devote himself entirely to cell phoning and get out of the way in the gym. Working hard is a basic pillar of fitness and you cannot be working hard if your mind is not engaged.
I sometimes find the flat benches I want to use occupied by a cell phone. I always feel the compulsion to "accidentally" drop an 80 lb dumbbell on it.
The other cartoon character is Easy Rider. This is a person who can be found on the recumbent bicycle. He doesnÂt cause anyone any inconvenience. Nevertheless, it makes me sad to see someone so ill-informed or willing to delude himself. Easy Rider is pedaling at about 50 rpm. Unless he is elderly and/or under strict orders from his doctor to take it really slow, he is wasting his time. Fitness is about challenging your body and that means it is better to set a faster pace and ride a shorter time than it is to dawdle along. Easy Rider may also have a book or magazine he is perusing while he slow motions along. I can see a book along with a brisk pace, but even then at some point you have to put aside the distractions and engage your mind in your pedaling.
This brings me to the positive side of these goofs. If you don't come to understand that training your body is a high concentration, focused enterprise you are expending energy without profit. At the end of a workout you should be a little mentally tired along with the physical. Cell Phony and Easy Rider are trying to have it both ways: get in shape and not put out much effort. Not going to happen. Your servant, as always.
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